Nobody wants to be miserable and unhappy but misery finds us anyways. We run towards fame, sex and money. We read books, do meditation and distract ourselves in hedonisms of different kinds, and yet we are miserable sometimes.
Why is unhappiness such an intrinsic part of life? Why can't we avoid it?
Unhappiness can not completely go from our lives but we can minimize it. One way to do this is to look at avoidable things that unhappy people do and try to avoid them.
Here are a few things that are characteristics of people who are never happy:
They are pessimistic to the core
Some negativity is part of life and almost everybody is pessimistic once in a while but some people have no optimism or positivity in them whatsoever. They will always find fault in things. Bring a flower to them and they will point towards its thorns. Shine a light on them and they will look towards its shadows. They will even find dark spots in the sun.
They will hear harmless laughter and find scorn in it. They will see someone smile and find malice. Such people can never be happy. Their happiest and brightest moments are full of misery. These people are always miserable and bring misery and unhappiness to others that are around them.
They have no empathy
Some people are so absorbed in themselves that they don't understand other people's feelings. People are happy and sad around them but they don't care. Only their own happiness and loss matter to them. They don't share moments of joy and sadness with other people. Physically they are around friends and family but mentally they are alone.
Such people want constant attention from other people and when they don't get it they become miserable. Some of them might get some fleeting pleasure in fame and popularity but the genuine pleasure and satisfaction of sharing moments of happiness and loss with somebody are never theirs. They may look happy but deep down they are always looking for that genuine happiness that they never find.
Excessive gossip and slander
Some people just never shut up. They will keep talking and most of the time they talk about other people's faults. They will find faults in everybody and if they can't they will make things up. They will gossip to everybody about everybody. Nobody is safe from their gossip. Not even their friends and family. Such people quickly lose the trust of the people around them. People become wary of them and keep them at a distance.
They are around everybody but they are never close to anybody. They keep finding faults in others until they see nothing but misery and evil around them. It isn't strange then that they are never happy.
Sense of Entitlement
Some people give too much importance to themselves. They always demand proper respect (in their own minds) from other people. If somebody praises them they take it as their right. They never show gratitude towards others. In their minds, they have all the rights but no duties.
It is only through gratitude that we can appreciate and enjoy the beauty of people and things around us. But such people never show gratitude towards anybody or anything. They never feel contentment. They are never happy.
They don't forgive and forgetHolding grudges on small things. Never forgiving anybody. People sometimes look for eternal justice in this world but the fact is that the world is just not made this way. People slight each other, are unjust and abusive. These are bad things and nobody wants them but we all have to deal with these things.
Some people just hold on to these slights and abuses. They never forget and forgive anybody. They keep on holding grudges and remembering them. But what do they accomplish? They only make themselves miserable and nothing more. Even if they get justice, the time, the energy that they spent dwelling on these things could have gone to something positive. Such people are never truly happy because they always have another grudge to hold on to. They always have somebody to repay the debt. They are imprisoned by their anger and never happy.
Negativity and pessimism make this world look dark. It can even take you to nihilism and suicidal thoughts. Unhappiness breeds on such grounds. To avoid it look towards the brighter side of life, show gratitude, and smile.
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